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via AU's to break your heart. - anonymousAlchemist - Over the Garden Wall (Cartoon) [Archive of Our Own]:

FIC REC TIME. With a title like that you’d have to try real hard to get me to not read this, because I am a terrible human being who revels in fictional misery.


Tiny eldritch abomination Greg is weird and cute in a sad sort of way (aka the best way)

Wirt as the woodsman loving his brother and rationalizing the things he ends up doing for that love


A population mournfully resigned to the darkness; they don’t have to like it, but they have to live with it (see: why I love Welcome to Night Vale, but where that’s very California desert, this is very New England-y)

The third story is unfinished, but the author wrote a summary of the way they were planning to do it and honestly it’s intriguing and morbid and lovely.

They have a tumblr @anonymousalchemist​ but my browser refuses to load it for reasons
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u know i’ve expressed my love for fake married/fake dating many, many times but like. is anything better. is anything better on this earth. does any trope or genre truly care for us quite like this one. let us reflect on a few of the gifts that fake married/dating consistently gives us:

character a asks “hey, will you pretend to be my date for a week for [convoluted excuse that could easily be solved without a fake relationship]?” character b, fully convinced of the futility of their DEEP AND UNREQUITED LOVE, figures this’ll be a chance to spend time with them and possibly put their feelings to rest. character b is always wrong & it is always amazing.

having to SHARE A LIVING SPACE FOR ARBITRARY FIC REASONS. having to see eachother in their pajamas first thing in the morning, messy haired, drowsy eyed and soft faced. going from “you can have the bathroom first” to brushing their teeth beside eachother and feeling like this closeness has always existed (at the same time, painfully aware that it won’t always). 

related to the last one — “”practicing”” their casual touching so that it’s easier when they’re in public. feeling SWOOPS OF ARDOR AND AGONY when they feel the brush of a hand on their neck, or an arm loop around their waist. don’t you love how fake marrieds/dates are always method actors who must FULLY INHABIT their roles. i love it. i live for it. 

bed sharing. :^) we all pretend we’re bigger than this but we are not. 

“kiss me while everyone’s looking.”

the character who wasn’t aware they were in love (maybe always had been) until the fake relationship is in full swing, realizing they have to sort their feelings out before their time together is up. sometimes they succeed and angst is minimal. most of the time they don’t, really.

telling eachother “i love you” in public and meaning it, heart aching over it, but bELIEVING THE OTHER 2 BE ACTING. my soul is still 15, this garbage still gets me. u don’t get pining better than this.

the days leading up to the end of the arrangement where one of them, still confused and muddy about their Feelings and unsure how to break things off, stiffens to the casual, reflexive touching and puts their walls back up. the other one accepts and respects this as the end of their agreement and squashes back down all the hope they ever had, stuffs it next to the heartbreak they’re ignoring deep in their chest. 

when they realize they’re actually fully and enthusiastically mutual about the way they feel and it’s, like, two parts euphoria and one part agony because they just cannOT BELIEVE, the happiness tears them in two. maybe there are weepy or laughing kisses. i don’t know but i’m usually invested like 2000%. i love fake dating/marrieds. 


#sara did you write this list #aka why that one elementary fic is the greatest and will always be the greatest 

@strix-alba i’m just honored you had to ask (send me a link to that elementary fic?)

A Lopsided Symmetry of Sin and Virtue by language_escapes aka Sherlock and Joan go undercover as married for 26,000 words rather than talk about their feelings.


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strix alba

February 2017

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