strix alba

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Reed* is finally at a point where she’s ready to try talking about her feelings, she thinks she’s gonna be THE BEST at acknowledging the gaping abyss of sadness within her, and Viola** is like “what is a feeling don’t be silly those aren’t real” because she is a crotchety old woman who figures she’s going to die soon anyway, no point in being introspective and spending her last days crying.

(Little does she know.)

*40yo Bronx native and police officer
**70yo medieval Chosen One and dragonslayer

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Trying to write while also trying to fight the ennui in my brain is not a good combination. I have a day off and I’ve wasted most of it and I’m frustrated with myself for not being able to fucking concentrate for more than two minutes at a time.

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I reread part of what I wrote my senior year to remind myself of a detail and came across some inadvertently good characterization, i.e. Tanwen making tangentially related things into slights on her honor and projecting her trauma onto someone who isn’t even from the same world as her, let alone involved in her original problems… which I think might have originally just been for exposition reasons, but she’s also sixteen and a literal social justice warrior who takes herself Very Seriously so looking back it feels quite in-character for her to be reactionary in ways that are legit, but also vaguely embarrassing and don’t make her look good.

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I’m probably going l babble about my novel this month to keep myself energized; I’ll tag it all as ‘adventures in nanoing’ for your blacklisting pleasure.