Sep. 28th, 2016

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I know discourse is the word of choice in fandom nowadays but I kind of wish we would have stuck with “fandom wank” because it carries the implication that the anger involved culminated into effectively nothing and that the act was wholeheartedly masturbatory in nature rather than for any greater cause.

I saw this post about an hour after I saw a post that said, essentially, “There should be a word for that thing where [exactly describes ‘squeeing’].”

I feel like the time has come to produce something like this:



Squee: The noise you make when something is so good that all you can really do is squeak or squeal. A high pitched sound of delight, often accomanied by hugging yourself or others.

Squick: A fic/art/concept/topic that is repellent to you, so you reject association with it and instead retreat to your personal comfortable spaces- all the while remembering that someone else’s comfort is not your own.

YKINMKATO: Also called “kink tomato.” Abbreviation meaning “your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.” Used to explain why you are rejecting art or fic brought to you by someone else. A solid mantra to recall instead of sending flames in people’s comments

Flames: The comment equivalent of anon hate.

AMV: “animated music video” or “anime music video.” Often, this is stylized to fit a specific fandom, such as a “PMV” (pony music video) in my little pony. May also be referred to as a lyricstuck.

Filk: Combination of the words “film” and “folk,” this is a music genre, to which “fan songs” and “fan parody covers” belong. If you don’t really understand what this means, take a quick listen to American Pie, then compare Weird Al Yankovic’s Saga Begins

BNF: Big name fan. You know that one person who is just so fuckign popular in your fandom? Their art is always on your dash, everyone knows their fics? Being spoken to directly by them is basically being noticed by everyone ever’s senpai? That’s what these people are called.

DL:DR; Not unliked the teal deer (tl;dr, or “too long, didn’t read”), DLDR means “don’t like? Don’t read!” It’s a reminder that you are under no obligation, ever, to expose yourself to uncomfortable (or, squicky), or potentially harmful (or, triggering), material. Not ever. If you don’t actively like something? It’s not worth your time. Skip it.

Gen: or “genfic” “genart” etc. Fan works which contain no or very little romantic content. Often these are styled after the canon material, and may be called “episodic” ro “slice of life” in addition. 

Lemon: Work containing strong pornographic elements

Lime, or Citrus: Work containing mild or implicit pornographic elements

Sockpuppeting: The surprisingly common scenario of someone making a bunch of fake accounts/sideblogs to send themselves reviews or hate, to try to increase views or drama surrounding a work. The accounts they make are called Sockpuppets. 

WAFF: Warm and fluffy feelings. A genre of fic that exists just to be therapeutically sweet. Nowadays, usually just called “fluffy.”

Schmoop: Take WAFF and somehow make it even more syrupy. You’ll know it when you see it.

Whump: Imagine if you will, a hurt-comfort fic. The comfort might be considered WAFF. The hurt? That’s the whump.

Wapanese: When white autors pepper their anime fanfic with random, tonally inappropriate japanese words. 

Anthropomorfic: Nowadays we just call these “humanstuck” or “humanized AU.”

Wank: Wildly disproportionate drama that crops up because someone wrote/drew/did something that someone else didn’t like. Seriously, I cannot begin to express the fiascos that have come about from all this. Just… Just go look at this.

 Plot bunny: Story ideas that you probably won’t ever actually deal with, but that multiply entirely out of control, creating huge worlds in your head that you’re probably not going to write. But hey! You might! And until then they make great sideblogs/askblogs/tumblr posts.

Casefic: Fanfics that try to create an episode-like feel for procedural and crime dramas, moster of the week shows, etc.

Jossed: When popular fan theories and fanon are addressed in the canon of a series, and whoops, turns out we were all very, very wrong.

Kripked: When popular fan theories and fanon are addressed in the canon of a show and, hot damn, we fucking called it.

Secret Masters: The people who run the websites/ communities/etc that we all do our fanning on. Less relevant now that we have things like tumblr, but when everyone had to run their own archival and social sites for each fandom, it was more important to pay our respects to the strange and powerful beings that brought us all together and gave us our fannish homes. Think the staff of AO3, for example.

Bashing: When a writer purposefully writes a specific character as a horrible, horrible person so that they can throw them out of the storyline, usually to allow their OTP to get together without trouble. Distinct from fridging in that it doesn’t require the character to die, but rather to be such a screaming harpy that they get rightfully removed from the main characters’ lives for being an abusive hell beast. Generally, a type of character hate. Be wary of people who bash women, queer people, and POC with consistency: they are not safe to be around.

‘Squick’ also has an alternate horrible meaning for Harry Potter fans who were in fandom a while back. Dear god.


Purple prose: Fic that is excessively flowery and complicated. Basically the “me, an intellectual” meme. If it has the phrase “cerulean orbs” you know it’s purple prose.

Beige prose: The opposite of purple prose. Basically, the plainest (and, if done wrongly, the most boring) type of prose.

R&R: Read & review. Back from when fic comments were called “reviews” and there was no such fucking thing as the kudos button.

I don’t know if it ever got used outside of one particular small fandom I was in, but I’ve always been fond of TFWIC: “the fuckwits in charge” aka the show writers. Who, as you may guess, consistently made frustrating writing decisions (and yet we kept coming back for more).

TPTB (“The Powers That Be”) can also refer collectively to the show’s creators (especially for shows that don’t have a single prominent creator or show runner) and/or the network/production execs overseeing the show. Example: “TPTB wouldn’t let Xena and Gabrielle be in lesbians with each other, but calling each other ‘soul mate’ was apparently fine.”
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Tried to distract myself from a dysphoric panic attack by coming to tumblr, have just redirected the panic from gender to Trump.
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The Bouletcorp (more)

always reblog for the exact same experiences in the exact same old toyota and how much it colored my life as i know it
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- ross from friends 
- ted from how i met your mother
- drake from hotline bling

These are all actually the same type of man…the polite guy men think women should want because he’s “nice”, intelligent, fake cares about what is best for her (it’s really about controlling her), persistently refuses to be let her be, has crushed on her for years and refuses to stop chasing/pressuring her because “romantic”. he’s really a Grade A asshole

#types to look for: ben from parks and rec #finn from star wars #jake from brooklyn nine nine (via @phil-the-stone)
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Lol he’s talking to Paris or Escalus. I’m pretty pleased that most modern versions of R&J make Mercutio’s sexuality very obvious.
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There’s two types of Autumn:

the bright, colorful, happy autumn with pumpkins, apples, candles, and great food

the dreary, dark, creepy autumn with overcast and rainy skies, scary forests, cool temperatures, and halloween

autumn : the greatest season of all.
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Why does everyone say “house-wife” or “house-husband” when “House-spouse” is not only gender neutral, but also RHYMES?

the prof asks the important questions.

Wait, spouse rhymes with house? I always pronounced it ‘spooze’ in my head /o\ WHY IS YOUR LANGUAGE SO WEIRD!!!

Because English beats up other languages in dark alleys, then rifles through their pockets for loose grammar and spare vocabulary.
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“I AM A CREATURE OF DARKNESS” “oh hey sabrina.”

I guess the point is that you could shapeshift into the body you always thought you’d grow into when you were a kid

taller, shorter, slimmer, more muscular, purple hair, tattoos everywhere, tattoos nowhere, 

every single shoe would fit you every single time you tried it on, every single article of clothing would fit your perfectly, all you have to do is transform slightly, you’d never run out of ‘your size’ again

and you wouldn’t have to work for it at all, and you’d never be limitted by your bone structure or something. You could just transform at will.

I don’t see how this is much of a downside

When you turn into a sixty story tentacle demon and terrorize a city you want to get the credit you deserve

Oh man that would be so sweet. I could be an annoying fuck as an insect or something but you couldn’t kill me because everyone would know

That’s great but have you considered


~Halloween costumes



~stretching to reach stuff and shrinking to fit through spaces




“When you turn into a sixty story tentacle demon and terrorize a city you want to get the credit you deserve.”
This person speaks to my soul.
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So I’m rereading Harry Potter, and in order to freshen up the experience and to make sure I don’t forget my Spanish, I’m reading it in translation.

I like the way that Hagrid sounds in Spanish. Everything is much cozier-sounding. And I have no way of knowing for sure, but I think my impressions of the characters are probably closer to the way that JK intended them to be. As an American, I don’t have any frame of reference for the accent that Hagrid has, what the cultural stereotypes of people with that accent are, and I definitely didn’t have that reference when I was eight and first reading the books.

On the other hand, I absolutely have mental images of people who talk the way that Hagrid does in the Argentinean translation. Hagrid, Madame Malkin, and Mrs. Weasley*, I can picture them much more clearly; I feel like their characters have come into focus for me in a way I didn’t expect to happen. I expect it’s probably me knowing many more types of people now than I did when I was eight, and where I know people who are warm and friendly and uneducated like Hagrid. There was one line that Hagrid says when he first meet Harry, and I laughed with recognition because oh, he sounds like this older man I worked with in rural Peru. I’ve never met anyone who talks like Hagrid in English, but because I’ve met people who talk like him in Spanish, suddenly I have a frame of reference for his character that I didn’t before.

*(Mrs. Weasley sounds exactly like my friend’s mom in my head, which is delightful. She is tall, dark, and lacks freckles, but is otherwise basically the same person)

Harry’s dialogue, on the other hand, doesn’t really change the way I feel about him, but my increased reading comprehension skills since I last read the books has. I can figure him out a little better: he’s clever and resourceful and fucked up from a lifetime of abuse that he’s normalized to a frightening degree, and it hasn’t broken him the way it would’ve broken me. In a strange way, he seems to expect to be treated like a shameful secret, someone impossible to love, but he has no idea why – or, anyway, it doesn’t seem to have affected his … pluckiness, for lack of a better word. Sort of attitude of, “well, this is the way it’s always been, it’s not so bad once you learn how to manage it, and anyway there’s nothing I could change that would please them because I’m Not A Dursley”, without any understanding that the way it’s been is profoundly wrong. And I didn’t really understand how to analyze characters for myself until college, and as an adult reading about this eleven-year-old child locked in a closet for days or weeks at a time, who’s never been allowed to eat as much as he wants, I’m fucking horrified because I can empathize a lot better now than I could as a small child myself.

And of course he feels weird and disappointing when everyone in the Leaky Cauldron thinks he’s great! No one has ever expected him to be anything but underfoot (and it never mattered what he actually did, he’d always be perceived as a failure). Having expectations to rise to when he knows, knows, knows that he’s always going to be a disappointment and no matter what he does, someone will be angry at him. It doesn’t seem to be something that he’s consciously aware of feeling, but it bubbles to the surface whenever there’s a lull in the conversation between him and Hagrid, or him and Malfoy, or him and Ron.

I understand Sirius’s massive reaction in Stealing Harry much better upon rereading the books, is what I’m saying.


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